I'M MY OWN GRANDPA
I'm my own grandpa I'm my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know but it really is so oh I'm my own grandpa
Now many many years ago when I was twenty three
I was married to a widder who was pretty as can be
This widder had a grown up daughter who had hair of red
My father fell in love with her and soon they two were wed
This made my dad my son in law and changed my very life
My daughter was my mother for she was my father's wife
To complicate the matter even though it brought me joy
I soon became the father of a bouncing baby boy
My little baby then became a brother in law to dad
And so became my uncle though it made me very sad
For if he was my uncle then that also made him brother of the Widder's grown up daughter who of course was my stepmother
Father's wife then had a son who kept him on the run
And he became my grandchild for he was my daughter's son
My wife is now my mother's mother and it makes me blue
Because although she is my wife she's my grandmother too
Now if my wife is my grandmother then I'm her grandchild
And every time I think of it it nearly drives me wild
For now I have become the strangest case you ever saw
As husband of my grandmother I am my own grandpa