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Diamond Fred
Diamond Fred, Diamond Fred, Such a nice handle he said. He loved the name Diamond Fred. He erupted and cursed Right after his birth, When someone said, Let's call him Diamond Head. He found that romantic as lead, Insisting ever to be called Diamond Fred. Head denotes a king, they said, Not a commoner like plain old Fred. You can aloha 'til your face turns red, Yet not a soul you'll see On the beach at Waikiki, If we give you the name Diamond Fred. Suffice be, he had to agree. Was a needed boost for our economy. For all tourists would certainly have fled If they had ever named him Diamond Fred. |